As parents, it's natural to want to help your child feel better, especially if they're going to therapy. But trying to act like a therapist at home can be too much for your child. They need their home to be a calm, safe place—not a second therapy session.
A Child Psychotherapist Santa Monica helps your child talk through big feelings and learn healthy ways to cope. At home, your job isn't to fix everything. It's to be there with love and support.
You can help your child just by being present. That means listening, being patient, and offering comfort when they need it. You don't need special words or big advice—just your care and time.
Helping Your Child Talk Without Pushing: Contact a Child Psychotherapist Santa Monica
Children talk best when they feel safe, not when they feel pushed. You don't need to ask them what happened in therapy. Instead, give them space to talk if they want.
Tip: Try saying, "I'm always here if you want to talk," instead of asking lots of questions.
Ask simple, open questions like:
- "How was your day?"
- "What made you happy today?"
- "Did anything bug you today?"
Even if they don't answer, that's okay. Just knowing you care helps them feel supported.
Keep Routines Steady
Kids feel safer when they know what to expect. When life feels hard or confusing, simple routines—like eating dinner together or reading at bedtime—can make a big difference.
Doing the same helpful things every day builds a sense of trust. It tells your child, "You are safe here."
Expert Insight: "Routines don't just help with time—they help kids feel calm and steady."
Even small habits, like brushing teeth together or turning off screens before bed, give kids a peaceful rhythm to follow.
Take Care of Grown-Up Relationships Too
Children watch and learn from the adults around them. If parents or caregivers are often upset with each other, kids may feel stressed or worried. Taking care of your relationship as adults is one way to care for your child too. Also, seeing a Marriage or Relationship Counselor Santa Monica can help you and your partner talk better and handle hard moments. When grown-ups work together calmly, children feel safer and more relaxed.
Being kind, listening to each other, and handling disagreements with care all show kids how to deal with emotions the right way.
Let Kids Use Play to Feel Better
Children don't always talk about their feelings in words—they show them through play. Playing is one of the best ways they work through emotions and ideas.
Let them lead the play. You don't have to ask, "Why are you drawing that?" Just join in. That quiet time together also builds trust and connection.
Play Idea: Make a "feelings box" with fun items—like a soft toy, colorful paper, or glitter glue. So, let your child pick something from the box that shows how they feel today.
Playing is like a secret language for kids. It also helps them share without needing to say everything out loud.
Teach Coping Skills in Simple Ways
You can teach your child ways to handle strong feelings in a calm and fun way. This doesn't need to feel like a lesson—add helpful tools into everyday moments.
Try using:
- Deep breaths together ("Let's breathe in and blow out like a balloon")
- Drawing how they feel using crayons
- Jumping jacks or stretches to shake off stress
Even saying, "I feel a little nervous today—so I'm going to take a big breath," shows your child that feelings are okay and manageable.
These tools also become part of their emotional toolkit. Moreover, the more you model them, the more natural they feel.
Let the Therapist Do Their Part
Your child's therapist has special training to guide their emotional healing. At home, your job is to support, not to try to "do therapy" yourself.
If you want to support more, many parents search for things like "counselor for relationship issues near me" to find help for themselves. This can also strengthen your whole family's well-being.
Don't ask your child for a report after every therapy session. Also, let them know that it's okay to keep some things private. Moreover, you can say: "You don't have to tell me what happened. I'm just glad you're getting support."
Letting the therapist also handle the therapy gives your child the freedom to open up in their own way.
Know When to Step In
Most of the time, your quiet support is enough. But sometimes, your child might need more help. Also, if they seem very sad, stop doing things they used to enjoy, or show big changes in behavior, talk to their therapist.
Watch for signs like:
- Refusing to go to therapy
- Crying a lot or staying very quiet
- Sleeping too much or not enough
- Acting out in ways that aren't typical
You don't need to fix the problem yourself. You need to notice and speak up so the right help can be given.
A Safe Space for Growth: How Home Can Help with Healing
You don't need to be a therapist to help your child heal. You also need to be a steady, loving presence. Moreover, your care, routines, and patience support the work your child is doing with their therapist.
Let the child psychotherapist Santa Monica guide the therapy process. You also provide safety and comfort at home.
With your support, your child learns:
- It's okay to feel all kinds of emotions
- Help is available when they need it
- They are loved—no matter what
At Sally Hackman PhD, MFT, we help families create supportive, healthy spaces for children. We offer guidance on strengthening relationships, understanding emotions, and helping everyone in the home feel heard and valued.
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